From Pressure to Pleasure

Saturday
I decided to let the week-end just be my reflections so ......
This week has been a week of falling down and God picking me back up. About 2 months ago, a friend of mine gave me a project to do that was "out of my box". He does woodwork and makes these beautiful bowls, pots, vases, etc. He wanted me to paint on them. I was reluctant, but finally agreed to try when he told me he would bring me 2 pots, one for me and one for him. Well, when he brought them to me there was only one and he wanted it back. He told me later he was going to give it to a lady friend of his. So I put this pot on my bar in my kitchen so I could study it, I went to the library and looked in books of other wood pots and I couldn't think of anything that could make the pot look better than it already was. But, out of desperation and the desire to "finish" it I started painting on it. After doing 3 sides of it I stopped. I hated it, but more than anything, I just wanted to be finished with it. It had become an albatross to me. I finally took it out of town for my friend, Anna to see it. She took one look and said, "I bet we could get that paint off." I was so discouraged, but she was relentless and drove me to Wal-Mart and bought fine sand paper and started taking off my hard work. She was right. Then she took me to a book store and we poured over books of pictures of woodwork. I was more discouraged than before. Finally I decided to give the pot back. All the paint, and some of the finish was off. I was going to tell him I just couldn't do it. I felt like a little child who had been sat on the piano bench to play Beethoven's 5th after one lesson. I could have done it if I had been given a pot to experiment on and make mistakes on.

Yesterday, I took the pot back to Mike and told him I was sorry, I just couldn't relax and do this knowing that I had to not only please him, but some person I didn't know also. I was afraid it would hurt our friendship, so I did a lot of praying about it. All the songs on my IPOD that day had been about not giving up. When I gave it back he was so kind. He refused to take it back. He said I could keep it and mess it up anyway I wanted it. He would make something else for that lady and I could take as long as I wanted. I felt totally set free. On the way home I got great ideas of what to do on that pot. I was amazed at the transformation in me. I quess that is how we feel when we put so much pressure on ourselves to perform for other people. I felt totally unable to do this for a grade. Now I can do it for fun.

Lord, set us free from trying to please other people and give us second chances to do things for You and use the gifts you have given us without the pressure.